As a mother, who do you put first your child or yourself? Is there a stigma for the mothers that answer themselves? Does putting yourself first make you a bad mom? I know many of mothers that would answer, I put my child first. I also know mothers who would say they put themselves first.
After having my children, there was a period in time after each pregnancy, that I was solely focused on my children. So focused that I forgot who the hell I was! I would look in the mirror at an image that I had just abandoned because I was so focused on my little ones. It is very easy to get lost in your child’s life, so much so that their life becomes yours. And your life becomes a glimpse in the past.
However, I have come to realize that no matter what, as a mother, you have to put yourself first! I came to that realization when I found myself not wanting to enjoy MY TIME because I was so consumed with what my children were doing. I didn’t know how to have fun anymore. I was living my life vicariously through my child’s life. (Who by the way was like 4 at the time) A big no thank you! I had to snap out of it, and remember that I am a grown ass woman!
Remembering, who I was/ am, helped me to really self reflect. I understood that, I needed to put me first, before I help my children. If I am not mentally aware of the person that I am becoming, my children get the blunt end of that stick. Therefore, being the BEST version of myself will reflect on them being their BEST growing up. Meaning, if I need some me time to get myself in order, that’s what has to happen, period. As women we are nurturers, but the first person that needs to be nurtured is ourselves, and the rest follows.
